


A Happy Accident

by Lexilindale35



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Unplanned Pregnancy, Weddings, motorcycle accident
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-22
Updated: 2017-06-22
Packaged: 2018-11-17 11:08:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11274204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lexilindale35/pseuds/Lexilindale35
Summary: "Tears fell down my cheek as I thought about the reason behind this all. Cassian had a daughter. A little girl who looked so much like him he couldn't deny it. I saw him in her face through the pictures Elena had showed us. She was barely one and yet she was all him. Dark hair and those honey brown eyes. She even had his crooked smile."





	A Happy Accident

It wasn't raining when we started fighting. Somewhere in the middle of our argument the clouds opened up and it was pouring as Cassian walked out of our house. It was as if the sky knew we were at our breaking point. As if the world was mourning the words we said to each other. Cassian threw open the door and left.

The worst part was I told him to leave. I told him not to come back.

I let him get on his motorcycle and ride away. I stood watching in the window as he looked back and then sped down the street. My hands shook as I realized how horrible I had been. This wasn't entirely Cassian's fault. I had made him feel even worse about a situation he had no control over.

And now I had no idea where he was.

I tried to calm myself down. The rain kept falling and it wasn’t the kind of weather he should be driving in. I pulled out my phone and swallowed my pride. I clicked on his name and closed my eyes.

"Leave a message. Maybe I'll get back to you."

His voice hit the ache in my heart.

"Cass. I didn't mean it. Please come home. I just. I know this isn't your fault. I’m sorry. Please. Come home."

I clicked disconnect and buried my face in my hands. I had finally pushed him far enough away. Even the ring that sparkled on my finger wasn't enough to save us. My head hurt, my heart throbbed. Cassian was the only person who ever truly cared for me. And I had finally broken him.

A tear slid down my cheek as thunder boomed in the background of my misery.

I slid down to the floor, clutching my phone and begging for it to ring. I just wanted to hear his voice, even if it was to tell me he wasn't coming home. I wanted him to yell at me. If he yelled at me it meant he still cared. But when he walked out that door he was silent. And his silence spoke volumes.

I had finally pushed him too far.

Tears fell down my cheek as I thought about the reason behind this all. Cassian had a daughter. A little girl who looked so much like him he couldn't deny it. I saw him in her face through the pictures Elena had showed us. She was barely one and yet she was all him. Dark hair and those honey brown eyes. She even had his crooked smile.

I had no reason to be upset. Cassian had been as surprised as I was when Elena showed up. They had dated for a few weeks when we were broken up almost two years ago. We weren't together. He didn't cheat on me. But something about the whole thing felt wrong and I took my anger out on him.

Because now she was in his life. For good or bad Elena would always be there with their daughter. She had a hold on him, she had something I didn't. She gave him a child and all I gave him was pain. I lashed out, unable to stop myself. I probably drove him right into her arms.

I screamed into my knees as I pulled them up. The weight of his ring on my finger did nothing to ease my pain. We had never found this hard. After our first breakup we made a promise to never go to bed angry. And yet Cassian had walked out. And I told him to never come back.

"I didn't mean it," I said to the empty room, "I didn't mean it Cass."

I couldn't stop seeing her. She was beautiful, adorable. I knew he wanted to meet her. Elena had kept her a secret and now Cassian's life was forever changed. He wasn't there when she was born, he didn't see her smile for the first time, or roll over. He would forever blame himself for being the father he had. The absent father.

Another pain hit my heart. I couldn't make him choose. Because he would choose his daughter. He would choose the little girl who needed a dad, he would be the father he never had, and ignore his need for me.

I took in a deep breath and looked at my phone. I scrolled through and found my sisters name. It was close to midnight, she was probably sleeping, but I called her anyways.

"Hello?" She sounded groggy.

"Fey," I took in a breath, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to wake you."

"Nesta? Is everything okay?" I heard Rhys beside her and the shuffling of bedsheets. She mumbled something out of range of the phone, probably telling Rhys to go back to sleep.

I shook my head, "I think I finally did it. I broke us, Feyre. Cass he just left," another tear fell, "I told him if he left to never come back."

My sister sighed, her steps loud as she left their bedroom, "you two have had fights before, Nesta. He'll come home when he cools down."

"Not one like this. He has a daughter Fey. His ex came and showed us pictures, she'll be one next month and she decided it wasn't fair not to tell him. She's beautiful."

Feyre gasped, "oh Nesta. I'm so sorry."

"We weren't together when they were. He didn't cheat on me, it happened when we broke up for the hundredth time. You know me, always pushing him away. But I just. I got scared."

"Why? Why are you scared?"

I closed my eyes, "because she is in his life now. He told me when we were apart Elena was the only person he saw that made him as happy as I did. And now she gave him a child and I just," I looked at the ring that meant so much to both of us. The vintage diamond ring he had found among jewels his mother left behind, "what if I'm not enough? What if he chooses them and leaves me behind?"

"Breathe big sister," I could see Feyre sitting on the couch as she listened to me. She might be younger, but she was wise beyond her years, "Cassian loves you, so much it hurts him. And Elena kept this child a secret, I don't know if he can ever forgive that. But he chose you, he gave you that ring. You are his heart and soul, he will never leave you behind."

I nodded, "I hope you're right. He won't answer my calls."

"He needs time to cool down, Nes. He loves you but sometimes you need to be alone to process life. You understand that better than any of us."

"Yeah," I took in a deep breath, "I'm sorry. For waking you up."

She laughed, "I'll always be here for you. So what's her name?"

"Dylan."

"Aw. I bet she's cute."

"She's his spitting image. There is no need for a blood test, there's no doubt she's Cassian's child. We only saw pictures, but I just. Cassian is confused and hurt and I took my jealousy, my fears, out on him."

"You both have a right to be confused. This is a big change. But you'll work through it together. I mean you wanted to have children someday right?"

"Yeah. But only with Cassian."

"So you'll figure it out. Don't doubt him, Nesta. Be there for him, help him. He loves you and he needs you now more than ever."

There was a loud beep and I pulled my phone away from my ear. Feyre called my name when I saw there was a number on the other line.

"Someone's calling me, Fey. Hang on a second."

I switched over, "hello?"

"Is this Nesta Acheron?"

"Yes, this is she."

"I'm so sorry to be calling so late ma'am, but we um. There's been an accident and your fiancée is in the emergency room."

If I wasn't already sitting down my knees would've given out. I took in a deep breath and tried not to worry, "okay. Which hospital, I'll be right there."

I fought off my fear as she told me it was Velaris Memorial. I stood up and grabbed my keys, still dressed in his sweatshirt. I grabbed shoes and switched back over to Feyre.

"Fey. There's been an accident. Cassian's in the hospital."

My sister gasped. "I'll wake up Rhys. We'll meet you there."

\---

Somehow I made it across town to the hospital in less than ten minutes. I don't even remember closing my car door, but I ran inside to the desk and slammed my hands on the counter. I knew I looked as frazzled as I felt. But Cassian needed me and I was done being angry at him. Now I was terrified for him.

"Cassian Moten. I'm his fiancée."

The nurse clicked her tongue and casually flipped through her papers. She didn’t seem to be in a rush, she didn’t care that I was going out of my mind wondering what had happened to my fiancee. She chewed her lip as she slowly, running her finger down the list and finding his name.

"He's in surgery. The car hit his bike and he went over a railing and flipped into a ditch. He's beat up pretty bad."

Just when I thought I had fought off all my tears, more appeared, "but he's alive?"

She nodded, "if you wait the doctor will find you when he's done."

I wandered to the chairs in the waiting room, but really seeing the world around me. I had just fought with the only man who ever truly cared for me, told him never to come back to the home we shared, and now he was in critical condition. I swallowed the lump in my throat, what if I never got to apologize? What if he was gone and those were the last words I said to him?

The doors opened and I heard my name. I looked up and saw Feyre come rushing towards me, her husband close behind. Her husband and Cassian's self appointed brother. They were so close they didn't care that their blood wasn't the same. He was the reason I even met the big brute, the man who broke my heart and healed it all at once.

"Nesta, hey we're here. What did the doctor say?" My sister knelt down and grabbed my hands. They both looked half asleep, Rhys still had his pajama shirt on under his jacket.

"The nurse said he flipped over a railing into a ditch. A car hit his bike and he's in surgery," my voice broke, "I told him to leave, Fey. To never come back."

"Shhh," she pulled me into her arms and held me tightly as I broke down. I closed my eyes as I cried, missing her look at Rhys. I knew they were having a moment. She was telling him to go find out more, pull the brother card. I heard him walk away, her fingers running through my hair.

"It'll be okay," she whispered softly as I clung to her, "if he's in surgery it means he's alive."

I pulled away and looked at my sister, "it doesn't mean he'll live. Things could go wrong, he could be barely hanging on."

"Nesta stop," her voice was soft and she held my shoulders, almost shaking them, "Cassian is strong and if I know anything it's that he'll fight death to find his way back to you."

\---

We waited in the lobby for what felt like hours. It was close to one thirty by the time the doctor came and got us. He was tired, but Cassian was alive. They had stopped the bleeding and the worst of his injuries. He was sedated, but he wasn't sure he would wake up right away once the medicine wore off. 

"I have to be honest. Cassian died for a minute while on the table."

My heart stopped when the doctor told me that. His heart stopped, he wasn't breathing for a full minute. I almost collapsed from the weight of his words. It was Rhys and Feyre who kept me standing. They kept listening as I tried to come back from that.

"But he's strong," the doctor was staring at me, "we got him back and he's stronger than ever. He just needs rest. He hit his head pretty hard."

"Can I see him? Please I know it's late, or early, whatever it is. But I need to see him."

The doctor nodded, "yes you can go back. I'll come check on him later."

Rhys let me go and I practically ran towards the room. Cassian had died. For a full minute he left me behind. And that was more painful than realizing he had a daughter, more painful than imagining him choosing Elena. Because even if he let me go for her at least he was alive. At least he was breathing.

I guess that's what love is. Knowing when to let the other go, even if it breaks your heart. Even if letting them go means watching them be happy with someone else. 

I opened the door slowly and I let out a cry. They had cut his hair. Only one side of his beautiful dark hair was the same. I knew it didn't matter, they had done it to save his life. But for as long as I've known Cassian he hasn't cut his hair. I let out a breath and walked over.

I touched the strands that were still there, wondering what he would think of this. Wondering what he would say if the roles were reversed.

I grabbed his hand the moment I got to his side, "I'm sorry," I said quietly as the machines buzzed around him, "this isn't your fault. I shouldn't have told you to leave. I got scared. I don't want to lose you, you're it for me. I love you so much, I agreed to marry you."

I laughed through the tears as I looked at his bruised and broken face. He was still the only one for me, even under all the cuts and scraps. He was mine and I didn't want to share him.

"Please don't leave me Cass. I need you. And I know Dylan needs you too, but you promised me a life together. A life with love and a home with you. I want to be selfish with you. Because I can't be selfish with anyone else. Because after all the bullshit I've put you through you still care."

I squeezed his hand gently as a nurse came in. I tried to stop the tears, but she didn't look at me with judgment. She offered me a small smile, "I've been told those who've suffered head injuries can still hear someone when they're talking to them. Talk to him, let him know you're here."

I nodded, looking down at him once she finished fixing his IV, "remember when I got really sick and you refused to leave my side for the entire weekend? You brought me soup and my favorite movies and I was horrible to you? Well I'm not leaving this chair until you wake up. I’m going to be as annoying as you were that weekend. Come back to me, Cassian."

The nurse left and I closed my eyes. I brought our hands up to my mouth and kissed the back of his tanned skin, "if you move your finger, just one, I'll stop talking. I just need to know you're still here."

I opened my eyes. His fingers didn't move. His chest kept rising and falling, a tube was helping him breathe. I bit my lip hard as I realized how awful this moment was. Watching the very core of your heart fight for his life and not being able to do anything to save him.

\---

"Do you think you should call Elena?" Feyre asked after an hour of sitting beside him. The room was quiet and somehow we had gotten approved to stay. Maybe because I had been so distraught, maybe because the accident had happened so late at night. Whatever the reason was, I wasn't leaving.

I shook my head, "tomorrow. When there are visiting hours. Plus she has Dylan and they're probably sleeping."

My sister nodded, "right. You're right."

"He hasn't even met her yet," I whispered looking down at my fingers wrapped around his big hand, "Elena said he could meet her when he was ready. When he decided what role he wanted to play. She didn't want her to get attached to someone who was going to bail right away."

"That makes sense."

My eyes filled with more tears, "what if she never gets to meet her father? All because I was selfish and told him to go. He got on that motorcycle because of me."

"Nesta stop," Feyre used her teacher voice, it went through me. I looked at her and she leaned forward. She looked as exhausted as I felt. But I refused to sleep, "you are not at fault. The only person who is is the one driving that car. Cassian left because he was upset. Not because of you. Don't make this harder than it has to be."

I nodded, swallowing more tears. Feyre had offered to stay with me while Rhysand stepped out and called Azriel. Az was their third adopted brother, the sensible one. He was more than likely with Elain. They thought they were keeping their romance a secret but we all knew. We didn't care, but we let them keep it to themselves.

They would tell us when they were ready.

"What if he doesn't want to marry me?" The question was one I never thought I'd ask out loud. But it was the one that kept floating to the front of my mind.

Feyre stood up and grabbed my shoulders, "I've known Cassian as long as I've known Rhys. Longer than you. I've never, not once in all our years as friends, seen him unravel the way he has with you. He loves you Nesta. Most of us will never understand why. But from the moment he met you and you punched him, he has wanted no one but you. Elena was a distraction from the pain of that terrible year you two were broken up. A distraction that resulted in an accident. A happy accident I suppose, because a child needs to be celebrated. But he has wanted to marry you for so long I'm surprised he's let your engagement drag on for the last year."

I looked at my sister, "but Dylan. She's not mine and Cassian would want her family to be whole. He might want Elena, to be together for her."

Feyre covered my mouth with her hand. "Nesta stop. Worrying will do nothing but give you gray hair. He loves you, no matter what happened tonight he always will. Trust that feeling you get when he first walks in the door at night. Or the butterflies that fill your heart when you wake up and he's there beside you. Trust in the love, in the life you two have built together."

I swallowed the worst of my pain and took in a deep breath. I squeezed Feyre's hand and then hugged her, "thank you."

Rhys walked back in as I settled into my chair, "Az is 'picking up' Elain and then they'll come. I use air quotes cause I could hear her in the background. Why they won't tell us at this point is beyond me."

Rhys wrapped his arms around Feyre's shoulders. He kissed the top of her head and I looked away. It hurt to see them happy when my person was laying there fighting for his life.

A hand touched my shoulder and I jumped. Rhys laughed slightly, "you okay?"

I shook my head, "no. I won't be okay until he opens his eyes."

Somehow Rhys had settled into the same seat Feyre sat in and held her close, "well then I guess we're all in for a long night."

\---

No one left the room all morning. Az and Elain showed up around three. They took their own post and everyone dozed on and off. Everyone except me. I just stared at Cassian, willing him to hear me. To wake up and tell me it was going to be okay. That we were going to be okay.

I laid my head on his shoulder, "when you proposed I was shocked. I never imagined anyone would want to marry me. And yet you planned it perfectly. You had my sisters there and your brothers. You asked me, down on one knee, in front of all the people I love the most, to be your wife. I've never loved a piece of jewelry as much as I love this ring, Cassian. Because you gave it to me. Because it means you're mine."

I ran my finger down his arm, "I know I wanted to wait. But when this is all over I want to marry you. With my sisters and your brother and no one else there. I don't want a big fancy wedding. I don't need all our friends. I just want our family," I looked at the people sleeping in this room, “this family, to be there when we finally make it official."

I kissed his cheek. I wanted to crawl into the bed beside him, but I was afraid of all the wires. I was afraid of hurting him without knowing I did. I sighed and watched his chest rise and fall in time with the machines beeping.

"When he first met you, he wouldn't shut up about you," Azriel's sleep filled voice startled me, "when Feyre finally brought her family to dinner and you came walking in soaking wet and spitting fire, he was gone. You were a challenge, you weren't going to fall to your knees the way the others did."

I smiled at his soft spoken brother, "I hated that dinner. Mostly because he kept staring at me."

Az laughed, "Nesta. I've known Cassian longer than Feyre, most of my life. He loves you and it is you he wants. Even now when we get together every story is the latest Nesta story. He wants to be your husband, to be your only person. Don't let tonight convince you otherwise. Sure he will choose Dylan, to be in her life. But when it comes down to it he will always choose you."

It was nice hearing other people tell me what they saw. But I needed to hear Cassian say it. I needed to hear him tell me we were going to be okay. That we would find our way out of this situation and we would do it together.

"Thanks," I whispered softly, "I um. I'm glad you're all here."

And as the words left my mouth the machines exploded. It sounded like all the alarms went off and Cassian's body twitched. I jumped backwards and gasped as the door flew open and three nurses came in. They pushed me back, one held him down. The other two started to remove the tube in his throat.

"What's happening?" I asked after a moment.

"He's trying to breathe on his own. It's a good sign. But if we don't get that tube out right away he'll hurt himself."

I was speechless as they fixed him. The tube came out and he took a huge breath on his own. I grabbed Azriel's hand, he was the closet to me. He squeezed my fingers gently as everyone else waited with baited breath. What we were waiting for I wasn't sure. Because his eyes didn't open, he just looked like he was sleeping now.

"The doctor will be in to speak to you," the nurse looked at me whenever she spoke. I nodded and picked his hand back up, Az letting me go back to his side.

"Please wake up," I whispered even though everyone could hear me, "I need you to come back to me, Cass."

I laid my forehead against his shoulder and then it happened. His finger moved as the sun started to rise in the sky. He squeezed my hand with little strength and I bolted upright. His eyes fluttered and then he opened them so slowly I thought I would fall apart.

"Cass," I let out something between a laugh and a cry. His brown eyes found me and I couldn't stop the tears as I leaned in and kissed his cheek, "oh my Cassian. Thank god."

He winced as he moved. His hand stayed in mine as he looked around the room, taking us all in, "who died?"

Rhys laughed, "you almost did brother," he touched his leg, I refused to leave his side for any of them, "Nesta called us hours ago saying you were here. Do you remember the accident?"

His eyes settled on Rhys and then he looked back at me, "you told me to leave. After our fight, after finding out about... Dylan."

I nodded and leaned in. I pressed my fingers against his cheek and then pressed my lips lightly against his. I didn't kiss him the way I wanted to, but I kissed him the way I needed to. When I pulled back he wore a smile.

"I didn't mean it. I don't care about Elena and Dylan. I mean I care I just. I was scared," I whispered softly, "I was afraid you'd choose them and leave me. I love you Cassian. So much. I can't stand the idea of not having you again."

Cassian reached up with his thumb and brushed away a tear that slipped down my cheek.

"Nesta," everyone was watching us. I didn't care, because this was the moment I had been waiting for. I took in a deep breath as he struggled to sit up. The bed moved and he was higher, closer to me, "what happened two years ago doesn't change the fact that I've loved you for the last eight years. I choose you," he picked up my hand and looked at my ring. His ring, "I chose you. I told you I'm never letting you go."

I nodded, "but we have to talk about Dylan--"

Cassian cut me off with a kiss to my lips. His fingers ran through my hair and he pushed harder against my lips than I had pushed against his. I couldn't help but smile as I pulled away. His fingers were curled around my cheek and I never wanted him to let go.

"We'll talk about it when I'm out of here."

Rhys cleared his throat, "want to fill us all in?"

Cassian leaned back against the pillows and I leaned into him. I couldn't let him go, I needed to feel him. I needed to know this moment was real and I didn't just dream it up. I wrapped my arms around his muscle and held on as he looked at his brothers and told them what Feyre already knew.

"Apparently I have a daughter," he said softly, "Elena that girl I dated two years ago when I was trying to stop thinking about Nesta, she got pregnant. And she never told me."

The room went silent as they all processed the information. No one said anything, they just kept staring at the two of us. Cassian had a daughter, there was a little one that belonged to all of us now. I realized we weren’t going into this alone, now that they were here. We would have support, Cassian and I would have our family here to help with whatever happened after this.

Rhys blew out a breath, ready to say something, but he didn’t get a chance. The doctor came in and broke the spell we had been under. I looked at everyone and then the doctor looked at Cassian, "oh good you're awake. I have a few things I need to check, so can I ask everyone to give us a moment?"

Cassian nodded at me, he could read my hesitation in leaving him. I stood up and waited for everyone to leave, then I looked at him one last time. I stood at the door, afraid if I walked out this moment wouldn’t be real. He wouldn’t be smiling when I came back.

"It'll be quick I promise," the doctor smiled at me before looking down at Cassian, "you're one lucky man. She's been sitting here all night. She loves you."

Cassian's eyes sparkled, "not nearly as much as I love her."

\---

When we were in the lobby I pulled out my phone. It was still early but I knew I had to do it. I closed my eyes and dialed a number I never even knew I had. I pressed the device up to my ear and then waited for that familiar voice. The one that would be in my life forever, to answer.

"Hello?"

"Elena. Hi, it's uh Nesta."

The other end was silent. She was as shocked as I was, "uh. Hi Nesta."

"Look I know this is weird. But I'm in Cassian's life and now so are you. He's still confused but I think he wants to meet her. He's in the ER right now and I um. Can you and Dylan come?"

"We'll be right there."

I didn't even say goodbye. I hung up and closed my eyes, trying to fight off more tears. I would be there for Cassian as he tried to figured out this moment in his life. As he tried to find a place for all of us in his life.

Arms came around me, not the arms I wanted. But I leaned into my sister as she hugged me from behind, "he'll thank you one day. I know that was hard, but you're doing this for him."

I nodded, "that little girl deserves a father."

The doors opened and Elena walked in carrying a small child. Her dark hair was curled at the ends and she had her head down on her mother's shoulder. Elena looked frazzled and barely put together.

"He's okay?" She asked me sounding like the concerned wife. 

I spun his ring on my finger, reminding myself I was the fiancée. That I was the one he wanted to marry. I nodded, "yeah he woke up this morning, the doctor is checking him. I didn't call you until now because I didn't want to wake you up."

She offered me a smile and for a moment I understood why he chose her. Because she was the opposite of me, blonde and tall, a million watt smile. She was beautiful, and it hurt to realize how hard he tried to push me out of his life all those years ago.

"Can I um. Meet her?" I asked quietly as Dylan kept her head on Elena's shoulder.

She smiled, "of course! Dylan, this is Nesta. She's um. A friend."

I reached out and she settled in my arms. She smelled like a baby. Like freshness and innocence. Up close she looked even more like Cassian than I could've ever imagined. Tears filled my eyes.

"She looks so much like him," I whispered as she tapped my cheek.

Elena looked at me holding her daughter and nodded, "I didn't tell him because when we were together all he wanted was you. I heard about you constantly. My ex this and my ex that. He was still in love with you even then. When I found out I was pregnant I heard he finally got you back and I couldn't hurt him. I couldn't make him choose and I didn't want you to let him go again."

"Why now?" I asked quietly as Feyre came over and looked at the baby. She giggled as my sister made a face.

"Because I want my baby to have a father. I realized I was being selfish not only for me but to her. She deserves a father and Cassian deserves to know he has a child."

I nodded, "I suppose we'll have to get used to this. I'm not leaving him. I love him and I know you will always love him too. If not for yourself, for her."

Elena smiled, "I never loved him the way you do, Nesta. I never imagined winning him back and being a complete family. You are his soul mate, I would never come between you I promise."

I smiled back, "thank you."

"Ms. Acheron." I turned and the doctor was calling me, "I've checked your fiancée out and he is doing well. He asked me to tell you that you can come back."

I looked at Elena, "can I take her with me?"

She was hesitant, this was her child after all. But after a moment she nodded, "yeah. I'll wait here."

I walked back through the doors and took in a deep breath before opening the door. Cassian smiled, it fell slightly when he saw me holding the baby.

"Nesta?" His voice was soft.

"Cass," I sat down beside the bed and Dylan clung to me, "this is your daughter Dylan. Dylan, this is your daddy. You're so lucky to have him as a daddy."

Tears filled his eyes as he sat up completely and reached out to touch her chubby cheek. His eyes were wide and I saw everything play through his eyes. He was lost thinking about his daughter, but now seeing her he had found himself again.

"She's beautiful."

"She looks like you," I whispered as her little hand grabbed his big finger, "I know this is going to be hard. But I'm not going anywhere. I love you Cassian. And she is a part of you, which means I love her too.”

Cassian's brown eyes met mine as we sat there together. I smiled as the baby cooed happily in my arms. Cassian winced as he leaned against the pillows.

"Can I hold her?" 

I nodded and handed her to him. She almost cried until he settled her against his chest. It was safe there in his arms, I knew it was. It was my favorite place in the whole world. I was jealous for a moment before Cassian looked back up at me with that crooked smile. He looked like a natural and somehow the world seemed to fall into place. 

Somehow we would find our way to do this together. My heart didn't hurt anymore, because I watched my fiancée finally get to meet his daughter. I watched the man I loved with everything inside of me hold the little girl who was a part of his soul and would soon become a part of his heart.

"Marry me," I whispered softly as he held his daughter and I felt as if this moment was too perfect to be real.

Cassian laughed, the sound bringing light back into my world, "I thought you already agreed to marry me. When I proposed."

I leaned in and touched Dylan's foot, "I did. But I don't want a big wedding. I don't want to wait anymore. I just want to marry you. After all this I just want to be your wife."

Cassian leaned in and kissed me softly, his daughter between us, "well then, it's a good thing there's nothing I want more than to be your husband."

And even though the future felt uncertain and terrifying, in that moment I knew we would make it. Because no matter what life had in store for us, we were in this together.

\---

**2 months later**

The sun was shining and there was laughter coming from our little tent. Elain was weaving blue flowers into my hair. It was my something blue, she explained, as Feyre adjusted my dress for the tenth time. It was an old dress she had fixed with a few last minute pieces of lace. But now that Cassian was all better I didn't want to wait.

It seemed like now was more perfect than ever.

It took Cassian a full month to recover. He had been lucky. His build and his ability to roll most of the way into the ditch kept most of his injury minimal. The worst had been his head, but the CAT scans came back showing nothing permanent had been done. I told him he had too thick of a skull to injure that brain of his.

I planned our small ceremony while I watched him get better. He held me every night, promising me we were okay. That while Elena was the mother of his child, I was the woman he wanted to marry. After the first few times I started to believe him. We were it for each other. This was what we both wanted. 

It was almost as if the accident never happened. He touched me the same way, he pushed me into the mattress every night promising me between kisses and gasps that I was the love of his life. No one would ever come between us, not even his daughter. After worrying for a full day, his promises eased my heart. His kisses eased my soul.

Cassian's hair was his biggest obstacle. He ended up having Elain shave it all. He couldn't get the sides to match and he was so upset over losing his hair he was silent for an entire day. I told him it would grow back, that he was handsome no matter what. Sure it took me a day to get used to seeing him without his long hair. But I was happy to see him up and walking, it didn't matter after a while. When he laid me down in our bed, he still loved me the way he had before.

I hadn't seen him all day. The boys drug him away for a little bachelor party last night to celebrate us finally getting married. I didn't mind, but I missed him. His laugh was my favorite sound. His stupid jokes comforted me. I never knew until I met him that a place didn't have to be your home.

Sometimes it was a person.

"Are you ready?" Rhys asked as he offered me his arm. He was giving me away as the best man. 

I smiled as I took his arm, "I've been ready."

"Then let's finally get you to my brother."

I watched as Dylan walked down the aisle throwing white petals. She had mastered walking on her own, for the short distance of our aisle, last week. Cassian had been emotional watching her walk from me to him and back again. 

It took me a few tries to open my heart to her. Because after Cassian was released, Elena made it hard. She wasn't easy on Cass or me and that made it hard for me to see this future with them. But one night when she was with us she looked at me with those big brown eyes and she giggled, tapping my cheek and called me mama. And I melted. Then and there she became my daughter too.

Cassian was almost in tears when he saw me rocking her. All he wanted was for me to love her. To accept her because she was a part of him. It took me a while, but I truly did love her.

She ran to the chair next to Elena. She was still hard to deal with but she was bearable when she realized Cassian would put me before her and Dylan before both of us. He wasn’t sure he could forgive her. Not after she kept his child from him. But he was trying, for Dylan.

Rhys pulled my arm and the song changed. Everyone stood up and Feyre caught my eye, as she smiled at me. Azriel stood beside her, he winked at me as I walked past him towards his brother. Towards the man of my dreams. I took in a deep breath and we walked slowly down the grassy path. I wanted to pick up the pace, I would’ve ran to him if I was on my own. But I stayed beside Rhys, the anticipation making the moment sweeter.

Because Cassian didn't turn around to watch us. He stayed facing the minister, his head tilted back. It was a tradition he told me, to see his bride when she was finally given away. When Rhys got to him, he slowly turned to face me. He was a sight for my very sore eyes. I had missed him in the last twenty four hours and I felt like I could breathe again now that we were here in this moment.

His eyes filled with tears as he took me in. The dress was old and borrowed from Feyre's wedding. The flowers in my hair added to the blue in my eyes. I knew he had felt the same way, his own sigh of relief echoing mine as his fingers laced through mine. But Cassian's eyes didn't travel. They stayed on mine and he took my hand.

We both turned and looked at the minister as everyone took their seats. Cassian's hand was warm in mine and I wanted to lean in closer. To soak up his warmth and run away with him. But I stayed standing there as Feyre took my flowers.

"We are here today to join two souls as one. Nesta Acheron. Cassian Moten. They have chosen to belong only to each other. I believe they've prepared their own vows. Nesta?"

I took in a deep breath and turned so that I was facing my soon to be husband. I smiled as I took his other hand and looked into his beautiful brown eyes.

"You know that most songs are written about blue eyed boys. It actually angered me when I was trying to write who I felt about you. Because the man I love doesn’t have blue eyes. And I realized that when you fall in love with someone who has brown eyes you understand how beautiful and complex that color truly is. Your eyes are molten, golden in the light. If I could write a love song, I would write about the eyes that hold my soul in them. The eyes that offer me happiness and hope. The eyes that look at me like I'm the brightest spot in any room, like I am the only thing in the room."

I smiled as Cassian blushed, "I love you Cassian. And for some unknown reason you fell in love with me too. So today I promise you that I will never let my fears change how I feel in this moment. I'll talk to you. I'll laugh with you. I will be your best friend first and your wife second. I will cherish the little moments, because they will one day become the big ones. But mostly I promise I will protect your heart. I will belong to you as long as you belong to me."

I slipped the ring on his finger and I felt my heart fill with pride. I couldn't help but wonder if that was what he felt when he proposed and I said yes. That moment when you were finally happy. When the world finally made sense.

Cassian smiled and then took in a breath, "I've never met someone who's as strong willed and independent as you, my love. You're a handful, but I wouldn't have it any other way. The moment I met you, I fell head first in love with you and I knew I'd never find my way out."

I squeezed his hand gently as he went on, "today I promise to always warm up your feet on cold winter nights. I promise I will laugh at your stupid jokes and kiss you every single morning. You are my world, Nesta Acheron. My heart and soul. You are everything I never thought I'd find and everything I never thought I needed. So today I promise you that I am yours. I will love you until the world stops turning. Until we are nothing more than embers and dust. And if there is another world after this, I will find you and I will love you even then."

He slipped the simple silver band on in front of my diamond ring. I smiled at him, our hands joined back together as the minister said a few more words.

"You may kiss your bride."

Cassian didn't hesitate. He pulled me in and pressed his lips to mine. It took us a long time to get here. I wouldn't change a moment of our journey, if it meant I got to spend my life beside him. And I knew from this moment on we would live happily ever after.


End file.
